Merry Christmas

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband, 

This Christmas amazing things have been happening. Rekindling the magic of an old love for one... something that may or may not be a good thing. The one thing I know I must do is follow my heart and that is something  not all of you may agree with. 

I have put off trying any online dating sites during the holidays because of the following:

1. Guys are lonely and desperate 
2. My heart isn't in it
3. THE SAME OLD SHIT. 

What is the same old shit? 

The same guys that have contacted me in the past. 

        Just because you have a beard now does not mean I want to ride it. 

Do you have any other pictures?

        I have 10 that are frequently updated. I refuse to send you titty shots so please. Stop. Do us all a favor and stop. 

Have I seen you around before? 

        Uh... maybe? But if you are so interested in me behind a computer screen I highly doubt you will be that interesting in person. Grow balls, be a man and introduce yourself.

Does it get any easier? Am I doomed to be the single friend forever? It comes so fucking easy for everyone else. 

I miss my blue-eyed devil. The fights, the making up... making out, his smile, his intellect, how he challenges me. But round 5 with the same guy? Not sure I have much more patience left. And I know it is wrong, but it feels so right!

Dear Santa,

I want him for Christmas.

Love, 

XOXO

**ME**

 

Insomnia because of him

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband,

Really? Really?!? Can't a girl just move on and not get texts from you at 1:30 in the morning! 

And now my heart is sunk, my hands are shaking and I can't think. But, my dear supportive readers, I will not respond. I must not. I need to move on. Somehow, I must move on. 

XOXO 

**ME**

Mini update

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband, 

I'm a completely beautiful mess. A lush. A women who's incomplete life seems to have finally begun to make sense. In this moment, right now, I am happy. 

There is no man behind this feeling. For once... 

But, when is the right time to get back out into the dating world after 4 years was throw out the window? When do I hop back on the dating site train?

If anyone is out there? If anyone is still reading this... help! 

XOXO
**ME**

Food For Thought

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband, 

I would like to thank a very amazing friend for finding me this poem. 

XoXo

ME

Boomerang

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband, 

I fell in love. 

I fell in love and then my entire world crashed on me. There is no easy way to say what happened, in fact, it was a 4 year long process of giving everything to the one man who would just take and take and take. 

I fell in love and now I hate him with the same amount of passion that I loved him with. 

Why Boomerang? Well, for those of you to know who I really am, would all agree it is the perfect analogy for who I am with him. The most perfect boomerang. His favorite toy. He would toss me... no, throw me far and just like a boomerang I would come back to him. It was always like this, but with blind love I always refused to see it.  

So with a heavy, but open heart I welcome you all back. I can't promise my manventures are going to be half as exciting as they once were, but they will be a new step into the future.


XOXO

ME