Dealing With His Ex

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband, 

Girl meets guy. Things go great, amazing maybe. Great times hanging out, amazing conversation and equally as amazing sex. She thinks, HOW could any of this go bad? 

Enter Crazy Ex

My recent encounter with said "creature"? Nightmare!

How could it be that bad, you ask? The blue-eyed devil and I woke up at 6 am randomly and he, suddenly being Mr. Romantical, thought breakfast in bed would be a great idea. I, of course, did not fight this idea since it included my two favorite things on a Saturday morning. Breakfast and bed. I mean seriously at that time in the morning what would you rather be doing? 

(If you say "working out" you are a liar and I already hate your skinny ass) 

Blue-eyed devil went out to his car and drove to the diner (I said he was being romantical not a chef...trust me this was a wise decision). In a split second as he pulls around the corner a car screams by his place... 

• by car I mean Crazy Hot Mess Express 
• by scream I mean she literally SCREAMED out her window. 

Yes, his ex, drove to his place at 6 in the morning... sigh... like a nasty little snake stalking a poor unsuspecting mouse and POW! Poor mouse never had a chance. 

What Happens next?

After waiting for him to get back (which felt like hours but was only 20 minutes) I couldn't eat and was visibly upset. 

And when he got back?

I was already packing when he got in and We hashed it out. No screaming but there was tears on both ends. 

What was she doing stalking you? 

         She has been calling me all week. I answered. All she does is scream and cry that I shouldn't be back with you. 

What did she say?

        She was waiting down the street and saw your car. She followed me to the gas station, giant parking lot and then to the apartment complex down the street where she parked next to me and just screamed. By the way, she hates you and you will pay.

What's next?

        Restraining order... maybe we both should get one. 

Seriously? 

Okay, listen up. We, as the searchers of love, should not have to put up with this crap. Now I have had my share of cray cray moments like.... searching his place for the sign of cheating and deleting messages on his cell. BUT I have fessed up and we have moved on from that. 

• Please ex-ladies and gentlemen... Put away your crazy! 

• Future love... SHOW ME THE EX-FAX! I need you to ensure any left-over hot mess expresses will not show up at any point in time and make me question what I am doing with you. 

How do I plan on dealing further?

Pretending that creature doesn't exist and continue to be happy. Trust me it is easier then you think. 

I welcome any and all crazy exes to cross my path. After this monster I doubt I will have trouble with any of you. 

Kisses

XOXO 

*ME*

PS... Blue-eyed devil's deadline is approaching. May 31th shit or get off the pot. Figure it out. In or Out. Either I am in his life or not. But... I am thinking of extending this "deadline"... I can't help it. I love him, I am not his boss. 

Get Caught Up!

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband,

The last 4 years has really been a whirlwind of love and heartache. I wish I could have shared all of those moments with you, but I was too caught up in falling in love and having my heart broken by the same person to even blog.

Who is this mystery man who stole, broke and is repairing my heart? He is the one guy you shouldn't be with, seriously. My head tells me to run. RUN FAR! But the heart is something different. He’s self-centered, but caring. An organized mess. Unfaithful, but completely honest. And I couldn't see myself with anyone else. It’s a beautiful disaster.

Why do I do it? Don't I believe I deserve better? I know I deserve better, but I also know he is the one that makes my heart beat and palms sweet. Anyway, the last 4 years was an adventure of working out together, playing tennis... impromptu night trips to New York, multiple professional sports games, casino trips, weekends in Chicago and Philly and the most perfect birthday surprises in the world. Trips and sex do not make a relationship, but I have always felt like my best self around him. Some call it "comfortable", like it is a bad thing. I feel in lust with him fast and in love with him faster. However, my blue-eyed devil is also a self-pleasing man-whore. Our bad times included the work whore, the crazy bitch, Ms. Fed-ex and currently cat-woman. I like to refer to them as the others. And then there was always me... us. I know this all sounds like complete garbage, like I said before, I should run to the hills and not look back. I always look back and there he is with his arms open, stunning blue eyes and the magically words

"I miss you, I made a terrible mistake."

His "others"

1) The work whore - Met him the same time as I did. She thought it took 12 months to have a baby and burnt a oven ready pizza. She thought she was the only one, it was a little comical. I guess I wasn't always a saint forgetting strategically placed earrings and underwear at his place. She didn't last long, but I did.

2) The crazy bitch - I could right an entire entry about this one and I will. For the last two years she has been trying to sneak her drug hazed ass into his life... sometimes succeeding, but mostly failing. I will explain further soon because there is A LOT of issues with her.

3) Fed-Ex - She lasted all but 6 months before the blue-eyed devil realized she was nothing he needed. Leaving packages on his doorstep on days when I was coming over. My favorite was the cupcake she once left. My text to him went something like

"You just received a package on your front door. I hope it is a bomb because I just put it in the trash"

4) Cat woman - Most recently... which sadly has broken my heart. I can only say I see myself in this woman. She has fallen for the blue-eyed devil just as hard as I have and I know she won't last...

The thing is.... what all these women have in common is they do not know about me. This is stupid, I know, but the blue-eyed devil and I are not in a committed relationship and never have been. We love each other, yes... but he is not ready to an exclusive relationship. For most of you this is an outrage! How could I ever be okay with this?! How could my heart not be broken!? The answer is the for both I am not okay and it is always broken. 

Yet, I find myself stuck, because I see myself with no one else and believe me I have tried!! But... I will leave that for my next blog entry.

XOXO
**ME**