He shoots... He misses

(March 5, 2009)

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband,

There comes a time...even when you think you find the perfect person when you step back and see everything they do that just doesn't fit the mold of "perfect". The Semi-pro was just that... the weather was still awful and his traveling wasn't getting any closer to coming to an end and we were not getting any closing to defining what "we" were becoming. Then out of the complete blue I get a call from him...

"I've been thinking about us and we should probably start dating"

My reply...
"We've hung out... what? once? I don't think that is grounds for a relationship and besides maybe you should make the effort to see me once in a while..."

his response...
"come up and see me tomorrow I will make dinner"

My response
"I'd love too"

Who am I?! Or in past tense who was I?! That naive to his game that I forgot were my head was...

I went... ate, drank, and as we were laying in bed the worst comment (if it even is a comment) I would ever want to hear...
I wish you were my girlfriend every night
Then I remembered the game and how much the game sucks. I was never to be anyone's night time girlfriend booty call (unless of course that was what we mutually decided on. Hey a girl has got to have game too...more on this later)

I left in tears... not because we weren't going to date but because I felt like I wasted yet another day on a guy who wasn't worth it. Friends save your "I told you so's" because yes... yes you did.

When I got home I deleted him from my cell, my buddylist, my facebook and myspace... yes my entire virtual world. This is the last time you will hear about me being with the semi-pro.

But honestly I am a hands on learner... so I will keep on learning :)

Xoxo
**ME**

Valentine's Day Massacre

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband,

February... a month that is for lovers, chocolate, roses, exciting dates, and happiness...

Enter my February... a month of disappointments so bare with me and I'll get this ball rolling!

At this time I was still talking to the divorced guy, Mr. Semi pro, the teachers, and trying to find ways to just 'run into' Mr. Dimples. The 34 year old is having an early mid life crisis... apparently me looking for someone to have an actual relationship with does not coincide with his looking for a fun hook-up. surprise...SURPRISE! Oh well... the other fine gentlemen as supposed to have dates this month.

Beginning of the month I went on a second date with the divorced guy... well guess it was more of a first hook-up. After meeting some friends for dinner at a new sports bar I gathered myself together and drove to his house.

*note to self... open toed shoes are sexy but not on icy nights*

Not much more then watching a movie... a tour of his house that ended in his bedroom and then his damn dog ran around the room with my bar. Seriously?! Future exes DO NOT HOOK UP with your dog still in the room... seriously! CREEPIEST experience ever! No one likes a cold nose, hot dog breathe and their bra being played with like a chew toy... I won't even start talking about the dog! ;)
I knew this was
1) the worst "date" ever
2) I probably wouldn't see the divorced guy again... even if he wanted to see me
Now the embarrassing part... because this is a tell all blog of course...
We were laying in his bed talking... and... I farted... HA! Seriously... I am so serious.. so he called me quacks and I ended the night. He still called me to let me know he had a great night. HA... ugh ladies nothing ends a bad date like a good fart... because everyone knows farts are funny!
But seriously... I am a classy lady.

Thennn there was valentines day... I spent it going to the bar with my best guy friend... awesome... some girls get flowers I took a few shots sang you oughta know and passed out in my own bed by myself...

Usually I am not that sad about the day. You know just another day... but then I thought about the surgical nurse who's birthday happen to be on valentines day. I missed him and it is had been hard for me to move on when my heart wouldn't let me. Funny how the nicest guy I had met so far also happen to make me cry the hardest as well...

The semi pro and I tried to see each other buttt the weather had other ideas... and I am not dragging my butt an hour to see someone who won't drive down to see me. So this could be it for the semi-pro... this can't be a one sided venture and if he isn't going to try I am not going to try either.

I also had a date with the teacher... but my dear friends it is almost 1am and I should really be sleeping!

Until tomorrow

Xoxo
**ME**

A long wait

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband,

I found my self only days after I stopped talking to the Surgical Nurse, talking again to the semi-pro. I guess it would have happened eventually since I heard from him time and again during my wasted four months of the nurse. He was like my guilty pleasure, like chocolate is for my soul, the semi-pro was to my ego. Always telling me how good I looked, how amazing he thought I was, or how perfect we could be.

I feel for it... once a month

He just drove me absolutely crazy!

I wanna see you...come down...i want to see you...
Well, if you want to see me that bad then drive your butt down here. I refuse to take unnecessary trips for someone who may or may not be worth it.

Of course...the big bad semi pro has to go and get sick. So me being entirely too kind goes up to see him and make sure he is alright. Why? His parents live almost 6 hours away and the big bad man is a a mama's boy. We went out for dinner at a little Mexican restaurant and drank some very yummilicous Margaritas. Ola! Watched some movies and "layed around" the rest of the evening.

In other words... bow chicka wah wahhhh ;)
He fell asleeo and I left his place and made it home around 3am I found that the trip with definitely worth the long wasted four months. The Semi-pro is a much better guy than I thought he would be...

I have two other dates lined up for the upcoming week or two so I am not taking anything too seriously.

One date at a time...

Xoxo
**ME**

A New Year....

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband,


Not the greatest way to ring in the new year...

"If he doesn't text...it's over" well... it definitely was good advice! Thanks friends!!

The surgical nurse did wish me a happy new year and like that it was over. The day time texts, night calls, and the butterflies in my stomach flew out in the form of tears. In fact one night he said we should talk soon and then he was gone...

He decided to disappear at a time when all I wanted was the one guy I truly had feelings for to hold me while I cried... Early January one of my high school and first hold communion partner died. I had all my friends but I wanted the nurse...I think it was then when I really realized I needed to move on.

Here's to the long country roads I won't have to take anymore

....so I moved on. You have too. Can't go back and change anything now and I realized the distance became his problem and his wall is there for someone else to try and break down.

I'd never learn to ride a bike unless I fell off a few times and I find roller coasters are more fun riding then standing on the ground watching. I got back on that unpredictable ride they call love....and not to forget the cliche saying of

"you gotta kiss a lot of toads before finding a prince".

I'm gonna keep on kissing...

So back on my site(s) I go announcing my newly found independent status once again...it's full of new exciting ventures and some old returns...
Mr. Semi-pro (he's back!)
The Marine (of course)
The divorced guy
The 34 year old
Mr. Coffee
and the teacher
....and more ;)

You will enjoy this new year of manvantures...
2009...Dating isn't a crime!!

My new rule.
Don't rule out anyone or single out anyone. This is just casual dating not a countdown to get married...well it kinda is...I wanted to be married by 27 (I'll be 25 in Sept) but I think I'll move it to 32.

Yeah...

Let's do this!


Xoxo
**ME**

Hmm maybe there is a good reason he is...semi-pro

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband,

The semi-pro text me while I was at a minor league baseball game with my cousin in late august 08... He wants me to come see him...he bought me a gift of some sort. He can be a little pushy, demending, but he is very veerrryyy focused on me.

Well...so I think at least.

It is always babe...baby...hun with him. I know they can be terms of endearment, but from my experience it's a clever way of not saying the wrong name. Yeah well...

He's moving for his job and will be about an hour from me. Which would not be a big deal if he didn't ask me to come visit on weekdays...we need a compromise and I have yet to get that with him.
I really need to think things through with this guy.

In other news!!! Early september I started emailing this new guy. He's 25, a surgical nurse, played Lax in college and is just really down to earth. He lives about two hours away so I don't know...I won't get his name tattood on me any time soon!

Xoxo
**ME**

Hut... hut... HIKE!

Hi again avid followers, newcomers, future exes and my future husband,

I joined a new site...

Yes, it is free. I'm cheap and with the men I'm meeting I'm not dishing out money for a date that turns into money. The great thing about this site is you need to actually pay to email people! Sooo I'm on for free letting the men do their thing. And they do!

So the first hour I get tons of messages from 40 year olds, recently divorced men, gangstas, and well some guy who could hardly speak English. It's cool...

I was just getting off when I got this message from a guy...who is he? We'll call him Mr. Semi-pro... What can I say about Mr. Semi-pro? He's 6 ft, perpetually calls me babe (which for some reason I don't mind), a college graduate, he's a gym and health NUT, and he is family orientated.... so why am I not jumping in my car and going to see him?

I need to wait... breathe... explore my options....

I'm afraid to meet anyone now that the marine is gone. crap. he told me not to wait.... SO WHY AM I WAITING!

We'll see.. exchange numbers...myspace...facebooks...

Xoxo
**ME**